Doing as I am told.

Pat Pat

I must pat pat pat myself on the head. I can actually see the way I write forming itself in sentences that impresses even me. Not bad ! I did not expect that. Somehow the command of the flow comes through. I have experimented with styles and wordings, thoroughly enjoying the process.

I like the look of my own writing !

Postaday 2011 is fantastic. Without it, I wouldn’t have gone so far about my writing. Practice makes perfect. Talking monologue everyday makes perfect. Blogging is monologing isn’t it ?

That’s plenty natural for me. After all  I talk to myself in my head. My thoughts talk to each other, have their scenarios in my brain. So it’s nothing really to print it all out.

What is happening I find is that I become more selective about what to write about. I mean I wrote a piece about a movie, 3D Captain America. While that made a perfectly legitimate blog post, it did not interest me.

I also no longer want to say that I have nothing to say for today.

It’s really interesting to see what topic I can dig up, usually it would somehow need to be accessed by a current stimulant, or else, I find I don’t deliver so well cold.

I find that if I reached my rawest soul matter, it gets responses. However, due to its dangerousness, I hesitate to do that too often. Too many stars died because of that. Ahem. Star that I am. Okay, stick one on my forehead. Ya well, I won’t be able to die glamorously like them. I am past that date already.

I did feel for a moment that I had to be on something to get anything of the soul written. That something being a self made brain chemical created by my situation of Number 4 as described in the previous post. You hear of writers who can only write when consuming alcohol, or artists who can only channel their creativity when on some sort of a weed or something.

When I made my decision to become sane again, moving away from the 4, I worried that sanity brought no topics. No drama, no melodrama. Sanity is average, is commonplace.

But that is not true. Melodrama addresses one aspect. Sanity brings a lot more other aspects, humor being one. I aspire to write from the place of Number 1 (see previous post. Omg, am I that lazy that I wouldn’t even post a link?) For that I have to be total Sane and funny and captivating. Writing from Number 4, brings nothing but self gratification, which over time comes self destruction but the book will be immortal. Talk about selling the soul. Who wrote the Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath ?

No no no. I will not sell my soul. (Hey I can write a song with this, following the lines of Amy Winehouse) I don’t want to go down that path of tortured genius. Very romantic yes, in notion but not to live it. Suffering. Well, a kind of proud suffering.

See, I am pretty sane today and look I have so many words down too.

 

Sigh, my only suffering for blogging is finding tag and category names. I don’t quite totally understand how to name them.

 

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